do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
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