Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize