Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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