She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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