She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
