He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
