just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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