After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
