At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
