walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
