There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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