peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
she peed on how many people?
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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