Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
