No stitches, just platelets and will power
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Randomize
