Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize