Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
i dont even know how to be here
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
