you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
