Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
