Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Randomize
