just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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