I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
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