Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Randomize
