toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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