is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
babies were throwing up all over the place
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Randomize
