Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
