Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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