I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
