Where did you get a picture of my penis
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
