so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
