South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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