And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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