he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
