"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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