ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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