Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
