Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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