You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Randomize
