I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Randomize
