You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
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