i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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