Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
