I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
stop calling my apartment porn island.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
