Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Randomize
