i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize