Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
