Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
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