wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
