I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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