just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
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