David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
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