bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
